What Is Hyperpaternity?
Any mother or father can certify that the children do not come with a parenting instruction manual. It is in this aspect of care where hyperpaternity comes in, a training alternative that confuses parents. Find out what it is and what it can do for children.
How hyperpaternity is defined
For many experts, hyperpaternity is a current phenomenon that consists of excessive parenting of children. It is a concept established by Eva Millet, author of the book called ‘Hyperpaternity’, where she explains clearly and precisely the characteristics that define these parents.
It is estimated that this parenting model arose in the United States and has spread to those upper-class countries. The premise that defends this phenomenon is that children must be prepared for the future. That is why they take them to extracurricular classes, sports, to learn languages … In addition, they usually give them the latest toys and take them to the most expensive schools.
In psychology for many years hyperpaternity was known as ‘helicopter fathers’. This term came from the author Haim Ginnott, who wrote about his mother referring to her flying over him as this vehicle.
How to recognize an overprotective parent
Children are expected to be bright and successful people without having to work hard – that’s why this behavior is not healthy. Among the common behaviors observed in these parents are:
- Constant stimulation of the children. The best way to do this is through countless extracurricular activities that prepare them for the future. However, they become so excessive that they somehow steal childhood.
- They solve their problems. They become the voice of the little ones and do not let them make decisions, even in basic matters such as games. For this reason, it is difficult for them to maintain interpersonal relationships with people of the same age.
- Immediate rewards. Overprotective parents are characterized by providing immediate gratification without measuring the sacrifices that have to be made.
Although children must be protected and cared for, psychologically this tendency exceeds healthy limits. There are cases where parents have come to accuse teachers of incompetent behavior or performance of the child.
Why are there overprotective parents?
There are several reasons that stimulate hyperpaternity in modern society. In some cases it is due to having children at a late age as a result of a long and painful fertilization process.
Also due to childhood trauma, pressure to avoid emotional distance from children, or fear that children will fail. This last reason is integrated into an insecurity generated by the global crisis that leads them to try to mature their children in an unsuccessful way.
Consequences of hyperpaternity
The direct consequences are very tired parents with ineffective children. This care model has been criticized by experts as it can generate anxiety and depression in mothers and fathers. These alterations arise from carrying a responsibility that becomes a heavy task.
In children, the consequences are usually sadder and even more painful. Fear and insecurity invade them, they become unable to make decisions and handle feelings of frustration. They even fail to test the abilities to feel autonomous, connected and competent.
In conclusion, the best way to combat hyperpaternity is through parenting with a lot of love and dedication. This key allows children to know, explore, and develop the qualities they possess of being independent and autonomous. In addition, it helps parents to feel satisfied by a parenting with value and positive results for society.
