Being Sensitive To Your Baby’s Cues Leads To Secure Attachment
Any parent has found themselves in a situation where their baby was crying and they weren’t sure why. Nothing that is done works and the little one seems like he doesn’t want to stop crying. He does not want a bottle, or breast, or sleep, he has a clean diaper … So what happens? Being sensitive to your baby’s cues leads to secure attachment.
As time goes by, the baby gets bigger and you get wiser, so reading these signs is more natural. These are not psychic abilities you developed, but a finely tuned sense to read your baby’s cues. It is not magic, it is motherhood.
Secure attachment thanks to your sensitivity to their signals
According to a study, when you are sensitive to your baby’s signals, this affects his development and the bond that you will share with your child in the coming years; you are creating a solid foundation for neural growth and development.
If your baby is happy and feels connected to you, this will probably improve the way he feels. According to this study, a parent’s level of sensitivity to your baby’s cues can be an important predictor of healthy parent-child attachment.
In particular, babies will form secure bonds with parents, who will be able to understand their needs frequently and accurately. A parent who understands their little one will know which toy they prefer, if they are tired or if something is wrong with them. Babies who have strong ties to their primary caregivers will be healthier and happier children in the future.
Children who feel securely attached are, among other things, better at regulating their emotions, have higher self-esteem, and exhibit fewer emotional and behavioral problems.
It is normal not always to understand the signs
It is normal that, on some occasions, parents misread their children’s signals, but nothing happens. It may be due to stress, an overestimation of the child’s skill set, or the difficulty of believing that a baby has negative feelings.
New parents may also have trouble understanding their baby’s cues due to the baby blues, postnatal mood swings, birth trauma, and feeling overwhelmed by the new situation.
Some little ones are not very good at showing their own needs. A baby may indicate that he is hungry when, in fact, he is feeling tired. Ensuring frustration on the part of the child is mainly due to the confused signal. Some new parents may overlook their baby’s subtle earlier cues, such as breastfeeding, because they are hungry.
If you ignore your baby’s breastfeeding signal, then it will progress to a small cry. And, if you ignore that little cry, then your little one will start crying loudly. When crying doesn’t work, you will have to use a louder, more desperate cry.
When early signs are lost, babies intensify. And, if new parents get distracted or take on a different task, they can miss the early signal and thus end up confused about the underlying need.
Improve understanding and secure attachment
So how can you improve the interpretation of your baby’s thoughts and feelings more often? The ideal is to observe your little one carefully every time you are with him. Many new parents approach parenthood with the mindset that they should know everything about caring for their child.
But you can’t know everything, so those parents are set to fail. If you approach your baby as a communication partner, curiously, you can listen to a signal knowing that your curiosity will help you find the answer. It’s that simple.
What if the baby is deaf?
If your baby is deaf or has a hearing loss, then you can rely on non-verbal cues to express his wishes and feelings. These signs may include sticking out the tongue and other movements with the mouth, looking into the eyes, shaking the head, having a tight stomach, clenched fists, showing different positions of the head and body, darkening of the skin under eyebrows and changes in breath.
Parents should try to observe and then reflect their little one’s non-verbal cues. So, for example, if your baby is sticking his tongue out, stick it back in his mouth too. It will let him know that you understand that he is communicating with you and that you are communicating. Initially, they will respond with some curiosity and then engage you in your language. They will feel seen, heard and connected.
Sometimes therapy is needed to enhance secure attachment
In extreme cases, researchers suggest family therapy. Some situations that may require counseling include feeling overwhelmed, struggling with initial conditions, such as relationship conflict, traumatic pregnancy or childbirth, or having difficulty bonding.
By attending a therapy focused on secure attachment to the baby, parents can change their behavior and gain a better awareness and understanding of their little one’s needs. Psychological therapy can also help strengthen your bond with your baby, as well as with yourself, and promote healthy emotional and mental growth.
