Is It Possible To Educate Without Rewards?
To get our children to adopt certain behaviors, parents sometimes use rewards to achieve it. S hile a prize, very occasionally, is welcome, we should not abuse it and we must strive to educate our children get no rewards.
What is educating with or without rewards?
As a way to improve children’s behavior, a behavior modification technique is used that consists of awarding a reward. Thus, to get a child to incorporate a new behavior or to stop having it, if adults consider it inappropriate, a reward is offered in return.
In this way, to get a child to brush their teeth every day, eat more vegetables or stay at school without crying, adults offer them prizes and gifts as a reward. These prizes can range from material gifts, such as toys or food, to free time to play in the park or with a family member or friend.
One prize is worth, but many are too many
Now, when a reward is a constant for our children to modify a behavior, it is not good. You need to be careful when waiting for a reward or a prize becomes a form of manipulation by your children. They should not get used to modifying, discarding or incorporating a new behavior just for the sake of getting something in return, but, on the contrary, children should learn that doing something well is their responsibility.
Therefore, the modification of a behavior by our children must have an intrinsic motivation and must not be related to an external reward. If to educate our children we always resort to reward, we can fall into a mistake.
Educating without rewards, a difficult but not impossible task
It is important that parents try not to always use reward as a technique to obtain results with their children. Because this does not allow to achieve deep or long-term educational results. That is, we fail to educate our children in the sense of responsibility, commitment and effort.
Adults must convey to children an intrinsic sense of reward based on internal and personal satisfaction. A satisfaction related to trying to be better and learning something new every day. The prize for changing your attitude towards something or someone, doing or learning something new, or expanding our repertoire of behavior, must be an internal motivation of children.
Therefore, we are in a position to say that it is not easy to educate without rewards, but it is not impossible. What it is about is to generate awareness in children, transmitting to them the importance of changing attitudes. And being able, in this way, to teach them that the greatest prize and reward that can be obtained is to be better every day and achieve what one sets out to do.
By last…
We must not confuse rewards and prizes with praise and encouragement. It is one thing for adults to use rewards and rewards to get children to do what we want and it is quite another for them to learn, mature and change their behaviors for the better. With which, these are the moments in which the praise and the hugs of encouragement are good, that comfort and motivate, and reward ‘achievements, without the need for rewards.