The Influence Of School Friends
Children often have friends at school among their peers. There are children who find it difficult to make friends with other children and have problems making friends at school. From a young age they have to learn to maintain these relationships and to have criteria to assess the attitudes of their friends.
Many times these friends meet them in class or are other children they have met at recess or after school classes. They are usually a very important bond in childhood since children spend many hours at school. If the children do not have friends they will have a hard time.
In addition, in adolescence these relationships become decisive in the lives of our children. Many teens make their gang the core of their daily life and follow all their decisions. Adolescents are vulnerable and tend to do the same as their group.
Relationship problems in class
We can run into the problem that our son is shy and finds it difficult to make friends. In that case we have to encourage him to find friends and not to withdraw into himself. We can ask for the collaboration of teachers to help you.
It may also be that our son does not find like-minded friends in class because they function as if they were a group. That usually happens when, for example, all the children in the class play soccer at recess and our son does not. You will have to find children from other classes so that you are not left alone at recess.
The influence of friends
Classmates can have a very positive influence on children’s lives. They can find true friends in class to share games and dreams with. Even these relationships tend to last outside of school, on weekends and holidays.
But they can also have a negative influence. There are friendships that may not be positive if they do not set a good example or behave in class.
In almost every class there are children who have more leadership skills and others who just want to join in with their friends. Child leaders try to influence the behaviors of their peers.
Boys can give in to their requests to feel integrated into the group or to avoid getting into trouble. Sometimes we begin to notice that our child begins to behave differently. If the teachers confirm it, we will have to speak to our children.
As children get older, this situation can get complicated. From the age of twelve they usually lock themselves in groups of four or five adolescents who become their gang and who move together in and out of school. They tend to share their hobbies, go out together and stay out of school.
In these groups children can make great friends but also if they are not clear about their criteria they can have problems. Adolescents can be drawn into behaviors that do not suit them if the decisions that the group makes are not questioned. That is why from a young age we have to be attentive to our children’s friendships to help them choose wisely.
Promote good friendships
We have to try to get our children to choose friendships that are positive for them in their daily lives. The most important thing is to teach them to choose their friends by trying to resemble them in their hobbies and behaviors. If our son, for example, likes comics, it will be good for him to meet children with their hobbies.
You also have to boost their self-esteem so that they can be sure of their judgment when assessing their actions and those of their friends. We will have to listen to your comments about friends and how this relationship influences them.
A good advice is that you do not close to a single friend but that you get along with all your peers in the group. Also that they keep their friends in other groups or that they make new friends at recess.
Finally, we will have to warn our child of the risks that following children who pose a bad influence may have. Children have to begin to discern from a young age whether a friendship is positive or can harm them.
